Update: Photos are now up. The galleries are below… please stay tuned for more to come.

Also sharing the original Tribute to Mom piece I wrote, for some background if you didn’t know her.

Thank you all for paying your respects to my incredible, beautiful mother. Here is the donation link, if you would like to contribute to the early education project in West Bengal, India in my mom’s name (update: the Prateeti Ghosh memorial project has been completed, but please feel free to donate to the Vibha nonprofit organization — it still makes a difference to children in need!):

Vibha – Prateeti Ghosh Dream Registry

The homeless feeding in my mom’s honor will be held on Sunday, March 1. If you are interested in helping out, please contact me for details.

Here are a few photos from the memorial service thanks to my good friend & photographer Bill Lohr, as well as some photos from the slideshow dedicated to her beautiful life (next gallery):

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Slideshow dedicated to Mom:

I have also posted a Tribute to Mom to give some more background. Below is the transcript of my speech at her memorial service:

A Tribute to Ma

by Tanaya Ghosh

…as delivered at Prateeti Ghosh’s memorial service on January 17, 2015

First, thank you all for being here. The support has been incredible during the most trying time in my life.

I never thought I’d be here so soon giving this speech about my mom, who was always superhuman and invincible in my eyes. Her spirit still is.

For as long as I could remember, my mother did all she could to give me the best childhood imaginable. She set a strong foundation for who I have become today.

She did this in many ways. By taking me to the library regularly, where I would spend hours picking out the perfect books, I got my unquenchable thirst for learning, reading, and my love of writing.

She taught me dedication and commitment by taking me to my weekly Kathak classical Indian dance classes for 10 years. I wasn’t always very fond of going to practice, but I did like to perform. She stayed firm and urged me to stick to it, and I learned what it takes to work hard for things that are worth it.

Her trust and confidence in me was unwavering, always. Believe it or not, I was shy like her when I was younger, as those who have known me from way back know. But somewhere along the way, due to life experiences, I learned that it was best to come out of my shell. I got bolder in exploring all that life has to offer, despite my secret fears that I must admit I still have, to this day.

My mom taught me to be smart, responsible and confident in my abilities, and she taught me to never settle — especially in the key areas of life that most women in our culture are conditioned to settle. With that faith in me, she supported me wholeheartedly in my adventures around the world, from volunteering in the Costa Rican rainforest to working abroad in Hong Kong. Her main desire was always my happiness and growth — even though she was a worrier, and even if that meant I was halfway across the world at times to make my dreams a reality.

Even though, as I grew older, I deviated from the way she was (gentle and more reserved) & came into my own, she not only supported me but enjoyed living vicariously through me in whatever I did… from hosting my own radio segment to pursuing my Master’s in Public Relations, from becoming a food & music editor to launching my blog in the time I took off to spend by her side… a decision I will never regret.

As I got more opportunities in pursuing my passions, she was the number one person I wanted with me through the wild journey. She would always be my first choice to take as my plus one to cover all kinds of events… she really was my best friend through all of life’s madness, the only constant sometimes. She even helped me film some of my videos – she would oftentimes get frustrated with my perfectionism in getting the shot right (who wouldn’t?) but she helped in any way she could. It was my secret mission to get her out of the house often and experience more of life, and I’m so glad we got to spend so much time together exploring new things.

As I got older, through life’s letdowns, heartbreaks and troubling times, she became my confidante, number one supporter, protector and source of strength. During the darkest of times, when it felt like all hope was lost in so many ways, the one person who always gave me strength, stability and a reason to live was my mom. Just hearing her voice on the other end of the phone… whether unwaveringly supporting me, or telling me like it is when I needed to hear it… she was always just what I needed, and more.

I still remember the night my world started to crumble. I was finishing up another 13-hour workday at the office, ready to work the Catalina Film Festival & then go on a much-needed vacation with friends, and was feeling on top of the world… like everything was going right for once – working hard & playing hard. I called Mom at the end of my workday to let her know I would be starting my 40-mile commute home, but by the extra gentle way she greeted me, I should have known something was wrong… that she was just being strong for me.

I came home to learn the unthinkable… that my always-seemingly-perfect-in-every-way, invincible mother had been diagnosed with cancer. My family and I reeled, our worlds turned upside down forever. And what did she do? She stayed strong for us for the remaining 15 months of her life. Throughout the entire emotional and physical roller coaster, she took it all with a smile and always asked how others were doing when they came to visit her. Such incredible inner strength from such a sweet, kindhearted person even during the hardest times in her life.

She was everybody’s favorite, from the dentist to her oncologist, to the vet to the Trader Joe’s cashier. Even the kids and parents at the school she taught at requested Ms. Prateeti as their teacher.

Although it was a long, twisting road, I am so glad we all got that final year to show her just how much we loved her. Not just me, but our family and the entire community of loved ones surrounding us. Even our beloved 15 1/2-year-old Dachshund, Jellybean, knew something was up. My mom, who had always given and given without expecting anything in return from anyone, was so touched by everyone showing their heartfelt appreciation for her. I am so glad she got to know how much she meant to us all before she was taken from us.

Mom, I will miss the little things, like how you would pick out the absolutely perfect greeting card for any given person and occasion. When I was a kid, we would spend an hour at the store looking through cards, and I would eventually get annoyed at her painstaking process for something seemingly so simple. I later realized how much the right words can warm people’s hearts and stay with them.

My mother was never one to embrace the newest technology, often opting for a book instead. I remember teaching her how to text when my dad finally convinced her to get a smartphone. Once, I thanked her in great length for the delicious food that she had sent with me, as usual, to my apartment. Her response to my lengthy text message was just… “ok.” And another time, she wrote an entire sentence as one long word, because she forgot where the space bar was! What I would do to get another text, call, or hug from her.

She started to learn Spanish with our urging, once she finally accepted an iPad into her life. She always had a knack for language, with her Master’s degree in English… so she caught on very quickly. She was excited to recover so she could go back to work and talk to some of her students in Spanish.

As a big reason for a lot of what I do today, I also got my love of cooking and food from her. She didn’t like to cook elaborate things often, but I convinced her to be my accomplice in many food adventures we had together. Holiday baking each December for family and friends since my seemingly charmed childhood, or a full-course meal for a special occasion… some of my fondest memories involved my mom and our kitchen, throughout my life.

She was also everyone’s timekeeper. I would often run late back then, so she would sit and talk with my friends who came to pick me up while I finished getting ready. Then, as I rushed out the door she would say “Have fun!” …and then ask if I had my keys, or jacket, or whatever it was that I probably did forget. I would rush back in and say, “Mom, what would I do without you?” before saying bye and running out the door again. I don’t know now what I will do without her… not just for this reason, but for endless reasons.

The best part of going out somewhere while I was living at home was that as I pulled out of the driveway, she would — without fail — be at the window… waving goodbye to me, praying for my safety, and waiting to hear all about my adventures when I returned. Now that window just sits there, empty.

My mom also loved all the treats I would bring back to her from all my food adventures for my work and on outings with friends & loved ones around SoCal. Her eyebrows would dance as she would really relish the ones she liked most.

My grandmother and mom’s brother always said that my mom was always so obedient, and never went out of line or rebelled. Although I turned out to be a little more rebellious & outspoken (but who wouldn’t be, compared to her?), my mom never loved me any less for it at the end of the day.

People say I laugh a lot, and smile a lot. I tell them, you should meet my mom. Mom, with your selfless and loving spirit, look at the friends and family you cultivated for us. The support we’ve gotten these past couple weeks has been amazing, and I am truly grateful. Once again, Mom left everything in place without even knowing it. Just by being her radiant, sweet self.

In her final months, her voice softened with me. I can still feel her playing with my ponytail in the hospital, with my head in her lap just laying there and enjoying her presence. Trying to soak up a lifetime of my mom in just a couple more weeks that we had with her. Trying to freeze time.

How could it be that I was the one taking care of you so soon? I saw the appreciation in your eyes, but really it was the least I could do… I learned from the best in how to take care of others, but I would do anything especially for you, the woman who not only gave me life, but raised me with an unbelievable amount of love, patience, trust and dedication. I, too, lived and breathed for my mom… the center of my universe.

Sometimes I question why her, as she was such a health nut. I remember watching “Dark Wing Duck” in the kids’ daycare at the gym while she went to her regular Aerobics class. I was the kid with the brown bread in preschool, and as I grew up my mom and I nerded out over reading Health & Prevention magazines. She cooked all the “right” foods for our family (using all the antioxidant-filled superfoods & making healthy versions of recipes), and we used to meet up at the gym regularly together after work. No family history… yet cancer still happened. Life is just so crazy, and quite honestly, I’m scared to live the rest of it without you, Mom.

I still wonder why she was taken so soon from us all, since the world could use more exceptional people like her… but then I try to remember what I now realize: She was an angel here on earth, and we were blessed to have her with us and to know her for any amount of time that we did. Although I lost my mom in my 20’s, I had such a unique and special bond with her that is so hard to come by, no matter how long one lives. If quality over quantity is really the best thing, I consider myself fortunate. I am so incredibly lucky to call the woman whom we are all here for today my mom.

Although it breaks my heart that she will never be able to see how the rest of my life unfolds & who or what comes into it, all I can do to make sure that my future loved ones know what a special person & influence she was is to tell them stories, show them pictures & videos… and just try my best to be the kind of loving support to them that she was to me.

It feels like every happy occasion in my life from now on will also have a deep sadness and emptiness to it… but I know that she always wanted me to thrive, and to be as happy as I can be, in whatever way that may be. Now I will try to do just that, not only for myself, but for the both of us. Some days, that is the only strength I have to go on. I love you Ma, and I hope I will always make you proud… until the day we meet again, my best friend.

I ask that you all please keep the memories of my mom alive within you, by sharing your stories today and long after. And most importantly, let’s all remember to carry at least a few of the many lessons she taught us by example during her time here:

– Smile often. Laugh often.

– Material things aren’t the main thing. For her, as long as she & her family and close friends were happy, healthy & harmonious, she was content. She took pleasure in the small things, like her afternoon tea & a good book.

– Life really is short, so never stop telling (and more importantly, showing) those you love how much they mean to you. Don’t hold grudges. And know that you’ll never regret spending “too much” quality time with those who truly matter. Do it now before it’s too late.

Now we’ll take a little break from the speeches and songs with the following visual montage. Special thanks to Sumita for working so hard to help me put this together, and to my dad for taking so many photos throughout the years. Even though we would often get frustrated on our many family trips around the country and world (we got tired of stopping to pose & smile so often!), thanks to you we have all these visual memories to cherish today.

We hope that you continue to hold Prateeti Ghosh in your hearts and memories to continue to honor her spirit and keep her legacy alive.